Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
