Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
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