The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
