i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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