ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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