hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
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Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
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we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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