And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
