come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I want her autograph on my taint
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
