seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
29 People Who Do Dirty Things Just To Get Their Way
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed