worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Randomize