About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
