Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
