love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone