I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
