That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
