...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
