Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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