i think i have herpe
just one?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Randomize
