For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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