Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Randomize
