I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
there was a trapeze. enough said
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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