I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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