Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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