She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
sex in a hospital.. check
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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