Its about making memories worth repressing
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
