Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
only you would photoshop your dick
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
