ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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