does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
