Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
