My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Too much gin, very little bucket
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
