Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
How external is "for external use only"?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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