i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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