come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
