Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
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