This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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