i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
