i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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