I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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