I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
