I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize