Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
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