belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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