Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
