the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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