So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?