i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
COCAINE IS GR8
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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