my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
