Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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