My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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