doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
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